We're losing too many talented people lately

Why do so many companies try to market people by having them look angry? Showtime's new version of the old HBO Inside the NFL program debuted this week, and the promotional photo of the cast makes everyone but Warren Sapp look like they're about to pass a kidney stone. I just want to hear about the games, Phil Simms. Please don't hit me!

UF is catching some breaks with the schedule this year. First Tennessee foolishly gives up a bye week prior to facing the Gators so they could play a game on Labor Day, and now Ike has delivered some assistance. The Arkansas at Texas game has been moved back two weeks as a result of the hurricane. Before this, the Razorbacks had a bye week to get ready for Florida. Now, they'll be coming off a game against Alabama followed by a trip to Texas. Compare that to the Volunteers, who have four games this year against teams coming off their bye weeks, and the Gators schedule is looking good.

I'm a radio guy, and I take my profession seriously. I do some other things, like writing for fightingators.com, but my first priority has always been doing the best radio show I can. When people in my business act unprofessionally, that bothers me a great deal. It happens a lot, from music station DJs getting press box credentials and then showing up wearing the home team's jersey (in Jacksonville, one idiot country DJ actually was cheering during a Jaguars game before getting tossed) to sports guys who don't know basic facts of a big story because they were too lazy to do some reading before they strolled in to the studio that day. Not content with radio having the occasional egg on our face, someone has aparently decided to go for the whole omelet this week. With Ohio State about to face USC, Pete Carroll suddenly is getting prank calls during his teleconferences with reporters. The last time stupid crap like this was happening, it was a "wacky morning show" out of Philadelphia. This will turn out to be someone from my medium again. Can't wait to find out if it was a Columbus, Cleveland or Cincinnati rock station that thinks Trojan condom jokes about USC are still fresh. Way to make us all look good, guys.

Michelle Wie has not won a golf tournament in five years. It's the reason her continuing efforts to challenge men are so absurd - she hasn't even beaten the women in half a decade! Now, the supposed female Tiger Woods has to go to Q-school just to try and keep her LPGA card. Good thing she spent all that time trying to beat the guys as a marketing angle, huh?

One of my favorite authors has died. Gregory McDonald wrote the Fletch novels, which are all marvelous. McDonald helped adapt Fletch for the Chevy Chase movie, and it was brilliant. Three years later, genius studio executives decided they could write their own storyline for a sequel rather than use any of the dozen possibilities available from other existing McDonald Fletch novels. The result, Fletch Lives, was a huge disappointment and the movie series died off there. It shouldn't have gone that way. Take the time to read Fletch's Fortune, Carioca Fletch or Fletch and the Man Who and you'll see how good McDonald was. His Flynn series is only four books long but is also well worth your time - particularly Flynn's In and The Buck Passes Flynn. I strongly encourage you to check out any of his writing if you can find it.

Next question!

Sorry not to have had anything new here for you yesterday. Had to cover Steve Spurrier's press conference for the Georgia game, and things have definitely changed. No zingers, no clever lines or even much distinctive at all from the Ballcoach. I think he's looking around the SEC and realizing there's a good shot he has his first losing season ever brewing. It's got to be killing him.

There are some stories I have argued with other media types for years about the necessity of doing. Asking a coach "would you take the job at School X?" is a waste of time, unless the coach is unemployed and desperate for publicity (which is why you'll see articles in mid-November detailing things like how Gary Barnett supposedly has always thought New Mexico State football is a sleeping giant). Also in that same class of stupid is asking players if they'll go pro or not. It puts the guy who's asked in an unfair position - they can't say yes and come off as selfish, but to say anything else likely means lying. Despite that, someone insisted on asking Alabama defensive tackle Terrence Cody the question. Shockingly, he claims he's staying. Of course he is - get back to me on that in January.

Missouri is trying to win quarterback Chase Daniel the Heisman, and they're spending fifty thousand bucks campaigning for it. What was their brilliant idea? Send the Heisman voters View Masters! Each week they'll send them a new reel with "three dimensional" images of Daniel playing QB. While I'm sure Beano Cook will be excited about the cool new technology, I suspect the voters not still living in 1978 will be less than wowed by this promotion.

I meant to link to this Monday. Andrew Carter of the Orlando Sentinel details how that "contract extension" for basketball coach Leonard Hamilton that FSU revealed right before signing day last year was completely made up. It was a ridiculous idea to extend Hamilton, so I'm not surprised. The recruit who picked FSU over Kentucky probably is, though.

Lots of college football games don't attract much attention, hence I was blissfully unaware of Arkansas State's 83-10 pummeling of Texas Southern before now. For one store owner, that game was sort of a problem. That's because he had a promotion going that made all Arkansas State stuff 73 percent off since that's how much they won by. Whoops!

Why were UF and UM playing for a Seminole canoe?

It was quite a weekend in Gainesville, with Florida reclaiming the War Canoe Trophy by beating Miami. Always nice to see familiar faces, and I ran into a bunch of them. The Gators get a couple of weeks to get people like Jim Tartt healed up before playing Tennessee, and for Dan Mullen to figure out that it's not a good idea to send 155 pound backs up the middle into a run blitz several times a game. As for the Hurricanes, if anyone can figure out the logic in Randy Shannon making a QB switch immediately after what turned out to be their only scoring drive of the night, you're better than me.

Tom Brady's done for the year, which completely shuffles the deck in the AFC and triggers waiver mania in every fantasy football league in the world. Chris Simms will likely be a Patriot by tomorrow - he'll save the day! If someone had said in June that the Jets-Pats game in week two would feature Brett Favre versus Matt Cassell as starting QBs, they would have been put in a rubber room. All three Florida teams took losses - Gruden has never had back to back winning seasons in Tampa, and he isn't going to start this year. Meanwhile, can someone explain how the Panthers and Bears beat San Diego and Indianapolis on the road?

I have to comment on two commercials which were in heavy rotation over the weekend. One is a campaign for a beef jerky brand (I'm not going to reward them by mntioning their name) entitled "Messing with Sasquatch". The spots all feature a group of people who, while in the midst of an outdoor activity, decide to share some tasty beef jerky. They then spot Sasquatch, the Bigfoot creature who is doing something harmless like marveling at a butterfly or sleeping. Our beef jerky eaters decide to handle the situation by intentionally doing something mean to the creature and then trying to run away. HAHAHAHA! So, is the selling point here that eating this particular brand of beef jerky will make you cruel and stupid, or are they trying to reach out to people who already are?

The other spot which grabbed my attention was for the National Football League. It's supposed to feature the variety of ways someone can get NFL content these days. One scene features a guy sitting in the airport with his laptop. Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue cover girl Marisa Miller, who's rather attractive, sits down next to him and looks over at his screen. What does our football fan do? He yanks his computer over so she can't see it, at which point she makes a bemused face and proceeds to start reading the SI swimsuit issue with herself on the cover. Wouldn't implying a shared love of football might help you bond with one of the most desired women on Earth be a better sales pitch than "we can help you avoid social interaction with anyone"? Oddly, the slogan for the spot was a studio musician singing "Every Day is Like Sunday". Yes, the NFL has decided to use a Morrissey song (although a cover of it) as a core piece of its marketing. I'm guessing Roger Goodell didn't get to the lyrics about "How I dearly wish I was not here.... come, come nuclear bomb".

The Tampa Bay Rays are suddenly in a tailspin, leading Boston by just 1.5 games now in the AL East. How did it all go so wrong? The answer can be found at the bottom of this story posted Friday on MLB.com:

"The Rays were under strict rules for their attire on the way to Toronto, as the clubhouse sign instructed the players to don Ed Hardy shirts and black pants."

The Ed Hardy t-shirt is the new version of the Von Dutch crap that was hot a couple of years ago. Everyone in Las Vegas between the ages of 18 and 33 hitting the town has been wearing them for so long that Treasure Island actually opened a nightclub with that as a theme. If those lame shirts were their rallying point, no wonder the Rays got swept by Toronto. Better toss them before they play Boston.

One sad note from the weekend: Don Haskins, former Texas Western (now UTEP) basketball coach, died at 78. Glory Road's a good book (never saw the movie) if you have curiosity about what it was like when race was as important a factor in a team's future as its style of play. Haskins was a legend and will be missed in the college hoops world.

The Commodores biggest moment since Lionel Richie left

Watching Steve Spurrier coach South Carolina makes me sad. The brilliance for playcalling is still there, but he doesn't have a soul on his roster who can do anything with them. Neither QB can throw downfield consistently, and the five star recruit he got at the position went nuts and was nearly kicked out of school altogether. Once Kenny McKinley got hurt in the second quarter last night, SC was done because there isn't another reliable receiver on their team. The Gamecocks allegedly had a great signing class at the position two years ago - yet another example of how ridiculous the hype and hysteria is about that every year - and none of them are worth a darn except for Dion LeCorn (and he's a third or fourth receiver at best). Vandy's 2-0 - Bobby Johnson is a heck of a coach.

I'll look forward to seeing some actual quality football this weekend. Driving through the side of tropical storm Hanna won't be too fun, but it beats the possibility of encountering Ike. This storm looks very scary - if you are in the potential window for it please do not screw around. I remember how congested I-95 was all the way up in Jacksonville when people were fleeing Floyd - give yourself enough time to get away from south Florida if this thing's coming.

As for the game, UF is clearly the better team and should win. The key item to watch for will be tackling - Miami will look to control the clock if at all possible using their ground game. Florida was sloppy with its takling in the first half against Hawaii. As long as guys make tackles when they have the chance, they'll be able to get the Canes off the field and put up around 45. The Gator Nation Tailgate show will be from 5 to 7 on the Star 99.5 if you want to tune in.

Daunte Culpepper says he's done with the NFL. When you have people offering you backup jobs that you don't accept, they tend to stop asking eventually. Culpepper's never recovered from the combination of a serious knee injury and the horrible PR he got as part of the Vikings "sex boat" scandal. I suspect we'll see him again despite the "retirement", but he's got to accept that no one is going to hand him a starter gig ever again.

Tampa Bay has a tricky game this weekend with New Orleans, one I suspect they will lose. Jacksonville has a tough opener at Tennessee, particularly with the Richard Collier shooting an enormous distraction all week. I feel like a loon for saying this, but the Dolphins might have the best chance of the three at winning this weekend. Since they're facing Favre and the Jets, I hope they're able to do that.

Dennis Green's NFL coaching career is likely done, thanks to his inept performance with the Arizona Cardinals and his screwy reputation. With the free time he has now, Green's still trying to cash in on his bizarre Bears postgame rant. Just a helpful hint in case you're looking for some early Christmas presents. Have a good weekend.

Hopefully Erin helped Jesse Palmer with his tie this week

It's gameday again for Gamecock fans, as South Carolina is visiting Vanderbilt. While I've covered Thursday night games before, I've never had the team that's my primary topic on air play in one. It's really odd, and while the Thursday night games free me up to come down to Gainesville for the weekend I'm still not fond of them overall. As for the game itself, I watched Vandy's opener on tape. Their QB Chris Nickson looked great running around, but other than their senior wide receiver Sean Walker I saw no credible threats in the passing game and no running backs of note. Their offensive line has virtually no experience (0 starts by returning players last season) and will be tested by a quality defense. If South Carolina's offense doesn't totally melt down again, they should be able to handle this one without sweating in the fourth quarter.

FSU's got a starting quarterback at last, and it's not Drew Weatherford. Redshirt sophomore Christian Ponder begins the year as the guy. This should make it clear Jimbo Fisher is in charge in Tallahassee, because Bobby Bowden wouldn't bench a senior with as much experience as Weatherford until later in the year when he was looking for a scapegoat. Fisher is thinking down the line and wants more reps for Ponder now so he'll be better prepared when Fisher's officially the head coach.

The natural immediate reaction to LSU postponing their game with Troy to November 15th is to say "no big deal". After all, the Tigers should cruise whenever the teams play. There are serious consequences of this move for other weeks, though. It's one game less of experience gained running LSU's offense for their current pair of QBs before the critical Auburn matchup on the 20th. LSU's other bye is slated for October 4, meaning they will now play the last eight weeks of the regular season. That could prove significant should they reach the SEC title game for and need to play for a ninth week in a row.

From the "no kidding?" department: a review of recent college football seasons by the Las Vegas Sun comes to the conclusion that failing to cover the spread is not a good idea for coaches. Next week they'll do a followup on whether it's also bad to regularly lose to your instate rival.

The NFL opens up tonight with the Redskins visiting the New York Giants. I'm not sure how much of it I'll have time to see, but I am curious abut Jim Zorn. I suspect he's going to turn out to be a very good offensive coordinator for Washington. Doing that for the first time while also being a rookie head coach may be a little too much to bite off at once.

Ben Folds Five is reuniting! It's for one show only and they're playing their entire last album beginning to end, but it's still cool. You never know, this might open the door to something more down the line which would be great to see.

R.I.P. Don LaFontaine

After this weekend's UF and Miami matchup it will be five years before we see another during the regular season. It's too bad, because it would be a fun game for the fans as opposed to the 1-AA crap UF's got lined up the next few seasons like Charleston Southern and Furman. I understand why Jeremy Foley won't go along, though.

Leigh Torbin used to be the number two SID guy for football at Florida before he left for UConn. He just returned to the state as director of the UCF SID office, and set up a George O'Leary media teleconference. Typos can make a big difference sometimes, as anyone who tried to phone in and reach coach O'Leary got a phone sex line instead. The real question here will be how many reporters tell their boss they had to stay on the line for an hour "just in case" O'Leary got patched in.

NFL cuts and the resulting fallout are always interesting, but I've never heard a story quite like this. Detroit signed Rudi Johnson to take running back Tatum Bell's place. There've been stories throughout Lions camp about Bell not seeming to care much about the game anymore, so being cut shouldn't have come as a shocker. Apparently Bell was trying for some version of the George Costanza "pretend it didn't happen and eventually they'll forget about it" approach to his firing. (In case you weren't a Seinfeld fan, Costanza just kept showing up for work after he'd been fired by the Yankees.) According to Pro Football Talk, Bell opted for the "he can't play if I steal all his stuff" approach and stole Rudi's bags.

One of the most distinctive voices in America has died. I can't imagine there's a person in this country who hasn't heard Don LaFontaine's work, even if they had no idea who he was. Here's a nice look at the man and his work.

Beaver roundup - say what?

It was a lot of fun being back on the Star 99.5 for the Gator Nation Tailgate Show (5-7 PM this Saturday, barring Hanna elated issues which don't seem likely at the moment). The first weekend of college football is in the books, and a few things stand out immediately.

1. The ACC is a bad joke at this point. No game all season will damage any team or conference more than Clemson's humiliation by Alabama. When the high point of your league's opening weekend is that Wake won and comfortably covered the spread against Baylor, you know it's pretty crappy. The football went so poorly even the ACC's pregame skydivers couldn't get things right.

2. Georgia suffered a major blow with the loss of DT Jeff Owens for the year. The lines of scrimmage are huge in any game and the Bulldogs have now lost their best lineman on each side of the ball.

3. The new Tennessee offense will wind up looking a lot like the old Tennessee offense. That's because last night on 25 tries the Volunteer RBs averaged just under 6.5 yards per carry. 41 throws netted an average of 4.5 yards per pass attempted. Fulmer's a control freak to begin with, and new coordinator Dave Clawson's about to learn what UT does when they play UF - tighten up. To lose to UCLA with a third string QB starting and the Bruins losing three offensive starters in the first half is astounding. The fans seem to be taking it well, though. Ok, maybe not.

4. Dave Wannstedt found a way to lose a home game to a MAC team, something Pitt had never done. His team had a 14-0 lead and lost by ten. The guy's amazing - he can go 5-7 with any level of college talent he gets to work with.

5. UF cruised, because Hawaii's really bad. Miami's not much better, but at least there's a rivalry aspect that will make Saturday's game intriguing. Very little else this weekend will have an interesting hook to it - it's one of the dullest weekends of the college football year.

I'm extremely happy Gustav didn't destroy New Orleans further than the previous damage of three years ago. Hopefully there won't be any more scares for them this year. While we all wait out the Hanna news, I give you this look at the potential next vice president of the USA in her previous career.