Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Should've said it was for Furious Styles from Boyz N the Hood, Greg

Tampa Bay has lost two critical division games in a row, and if not for the back to back home games against AFC West disappointment San Diego and total disaster Oakland to close the year I'd fully expect them to miss the playoffs. (As it is, they'll make it and lose their opening game badly the same way Gruden's teams typically do.) So, with Monte Kiffin officially announcing he'll be leaving, Derrick Brooks at risk of finally missing a game due to injury and general chaos descending upon my favorite football team, what do the players have on their mind? In the case of Greg White, the answer is legally changing his name to "Stylez G. White". Why Stylez, you ask? To honor Michael J. Fox's 80s film "Teen Wolf". Great - just great.

Meant to mention this yesterday, but they were boarding the plane so I didn't get to it. Ohio State freshman defensive end Nathan Williams was busted last week for shoplifting three shirts from a Macy's in Dayton. Williams claims a friend he was with was actually stealing the shirts, and since the friend had previous brushes with the legal system he decided to take the blame so the friend could avoid another trip to jail. The part I love is how surprised he seems that stealing things is, you know, sort of a problem...

"I didn't expect any of this," Williams said. "I thought I'd just get a ticket and pay a fine. I'm at a loss for words."

They take you to jail for the first time you steal stuff - who knew? Williams also acknowledges he hadn't called Jim Tressel yet, but I'm sure the Sweatervest is cool with learning about his players covering for their criminal buddies by reading about it in the morning paper.

On the plane, I got to read about Sondra Fortunato in the New York Post. I wasn't familiar with the name, but I knew who she was. You've probably seen her too if you've watched many Giants games - this is the woman who typically is in the stands dressed in some outlandish outfit like a wedding dress. That may change, as her cleavage is apparently now too risque for a New York football crowd to deal with. The Giants do not have a cheerleader squad, so they have a little fig leaf of credibility to defend this. Still, it's the stadium where Jenn Sterger is the pregame warmup act for the Jets. It's the stadium where females atending the game were pressured for years to flash their breasts if they dared to walk down a certain set of ramps. I don't think Sondra Fortunato's outfits are traumatizing anyone at Giants Stadium. It's amazing what people get worked up about sometimes.

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